Wednesday, 24 August 2011

Advice Accrued for Others

Here They Are:

* The ability to lose things, animal, material and imaginary!

* The ability to get the wrong end of the stick!

* The ability to avoid winning any raffles, games, lotteries, hearts, or even coming as high as second!

* The ability to lodge oneself up the noses of all around you!

* The ability to be the only one out of 16 lads walking down the promenade at 0600hrs in the morning, who get bitten by the lone wandering mongrel dog the attacked!

* The ability to be injured and immobile, and still fall off of the hospital trolley!

* The ability to fall asleep on the bus and wake up at the local Bus Station depot, unsure of who got the bigger shock, you or the poor bus cleaner!

* The ability to get peoples names wrong, and/or forget peoples names on a regular basis!

* The ability to misplace hearing aids, spectacles, remote controls, memory sticks, camera, pens, and spoons!

* The ability to end up with odd socks at the launderette!

* The ability to take your 5 morning medications at night, and your 6 evening medications in the morning!

* The ability to go into a room, and forget more often than not what you went into that room for!

* The ability to ring the wrong number on the telephone!

* The ability to be completely ignored at Bank queues, Business office queues, Job Centre queues, Hospital queues, Shop counter queues, Inquiry desk queues, Café queues, Pub queues, and by the general public!

* The ability to lose total and absolute control of all and any emissions of wind from your anus!

* The ability to scare people horrendously when I smile and say ‘Good Morning’ to them!

* The ability to lipread wrongly!

* The ability to get on the wrong bus!

* The ability to maintain your life of sorts, despite your constant failings and depression!

* The ability to tell the truth - this will get you nowhere, I know, it just confuses the bosses and politicians!

* The ability to want to help others - a futile quality!

* The ability to eat however much one puts on the plate!

* The ability to almost see your feet looking down passed your ever expanding bouncy belly!

* The ability to walk past a Barbers shop without noticing his prices!

* The ability to remember things from years ago!

* The ability to forget things that happened an hour ago!

* The ability to enjoy using carbolic soap!

* The ability to realise that the adage ‘You can’t teach an old dog new tricks’ is valid!

* The ability to realise that ‘Old age people are measured as an economic liability and a social burden!

* The ability to realise that ‘Old age is a mental attitude as well as a physical problem’!

* The ability to become a sociopath, and enjoy it!

* The ability to realise that:  When you live by yourself, all of your annoying habits are suddenly gone.

* The ability to understand what W. Somerset Maugham meant by ‘An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones’

* The ability to accept and dwell in ones missed opportunities!

* The ability to fall asleep, or forget about saucepans heating food on the stove, and let them burn beyond salvation!

Monday, 22 August 2011

Bad Service League Table

Food Retailers Bad Service League TableAugust 2012

August 2011 Food Retailers Bad Service League Table

May 2012 Food Retailers Bad Service League Table


They really outshone themselves the other day! (Unless it was me who lost it?)
There was no price on the BBQ baked beans, so inquired of a chap what the price was - he returned to me after asking someone on the checkout what the price was, and informed me that they were two for a pound!
When I got to the cash-point, I was charged £1 for each tin - and I queried this with the lady... who looked a bit puzzled, then said they were three for a pound! She fetched me another tin. As I limped outside, I though, well I've still been charged £3?
I didn't have the energy or will power to go back!

Not that use Sainsbury’s very often, but I had a dizzy spell on my way to Asda, and called in to JS to minimise the walking. I have never seen such talking between cashiers when they were supposed to be concentrating on serving - one thing that used to be superior at JS!


On my last visit, guess what? I was overcharged! You have to admire their consistency!
The bacon on sale was out of date, the fresh sliced bread at 1040am had still not been put on the shelves, and last weeks 24p baked beans were now 30p.


The speed with which the young man put my few things through the till, was so quick, he forgot to overcharge me! (Ha ha ha!) 


A marvellous store, not like those that rush you at all, their quite happy to let you join the queue of the only checkout open, and complete you Telegraph crossword, and use up your mobile allowance for the month. but the girls there are very good lookers!

1st June 2012


I was conned yet again by the youth on the check-out - no receipt given, added up the things when I got home, found I had been charged twice for packet of bacon I think... at least the difference with my total and what he charged was the cost of the bacon. I will not attend this shop on Huntingdon Street again!

On my last two visits to this shop on Mansfield Road, other customers were overcharged for items that should have been reduced - and I was very dubious about whether this was deliberate or not, as on both occasions, the till operator instantly agreed and muttered a 'Sorry about that, I'll get the manager to make it right.' And when he appeared, it all seemed to casual and accepted for my liking!
Well, they didn't fiddle, abuse or insult me such, but I did not appreciate getting 18 x 2d pieces along with some pennies in my change!
Calling in on the city Centre Greggs, brought about a first-time insult for me, from the pretty lady serving. I was struggling with my shopping bags as I approached the counter, and the label on the £1 economy cheese and pickle baguette was not clearly in view to her... and I feel so guilty about it as she said "Well which is it, show me the label... oh a cheapo, should have guessed!"
That was nice of her!

Friday 15th June 2012

Special Mention in Despatches for....

I called into this concentration camp... I mean shop today, to try and buy some potatoes, tinned Herrings and tinned Kippers - also with the intent of trying to avoid being overcharged, insulted, or put-down - but then I was always a dreamer!
The potatoes were grotty to say the least, the tinned 89p Herrings the 99p Kippers were selected, and I took then to the rather bored looking lady on the check-out - where I realised afterwards, I'd been charged 99p for the 89p Herrings.
On my two previous visits, the person in the queue in front of me were overcharged!
My turn today.
You have to admire their consistency!

8th July 2012 Food Retailers Bad Service League Table

Tremendous improvement this last few week - I've only been overcharged twice!

Once By

And Once By
I think it was a genuine mistake here... but....

Things are looking up!

Lidl top of the league again!

15 November 2013

After many months of hassle, health and legal problems, I'm back to report on the worst retail service providers I've come across in Nottingham.
Lidl staff have now overcharged me twelve times this year. Although on this occasion, the young man omitted to scowl at me. (Take note Lidl)
I bought five items, and found an added charge fora Sharon fruit at 50p.
To save bother, I returned to the shop with the reciept, and took a Sharon fruit from the display to settle it, after talking with a member of staff.
I'm still waiting for the fruit to tipen so I can get a knife or my teeth into it!